TURNT UPPPP!!!!!!!

Last Day of School!!!!!!!!!!!!
So excited because I don't have to worry about seeing some of these lame people anymore. I can do me, and chill this summer. I have so many plans this summer that I can't wait. After tonight's performance

(CAN YOU SAY STAGE FRIGHT but I think I will be okay if I remember my lines),
 I just have to get my cap and gown and pay my outstanding fees and WALK ACROSS THAT STAGE for good. I have no worries after that. I going to just enjoy myself and my FREEDOM. Nobody's going to stop me, because it's already a done deal. Point blank period.

Shattered

I scream, breaking glass if I could, but you don't hear.
I cry but you don't see the shimmering saltiness running down my clefted cheeks.
What happened?
I'll tell you what happened.
I transformed into me.
Then you transformed into a monster.
That's why I screamed when the door closes and evil opens its snarling trap.
Spirits moan and rush at me in this nightmare.
Insanity pads across white blank hallways of mental instability.
This is worse than the nightmare on Elm Street.
What happened to me?
Where's the beautiful woman my mother once saw in me?
Is it ravaged like a metal plate-all bent and used up and useless?
Is there hope?
Yet all I can think of is that door closing, blood pumping and evil apporaching.
It's here.
You're here...
I scream, breaking steel but you don't hear.
My vocal cords raw and nonexistent.
On the brink of my death.
I stare up at my murderer with wide eyes.
A question forms on my lips...
What happened?



Through A Child's Eyes

Through a child's eyes he sees a world that's in utter darkness.
A world where hell-bent demons run rapid creating a trail.
Through a child's eyes they see that same trail flow like a river boiling full of innocent yet tainted blood.
Through a child's eyes they watch and learn from the world's best actors-
Their parents.
Everyone wants to be something they aren't yet they want to reach the top.
Through a child's eyes they speak words that don't go in one ear and out the other.
So at a young age they can teach you a lesson or two.
Through a child's eyes, they recognize the need to step up to the plate when their parents are blinded by fate.
There's no escape.

Regrets

Have you ever had regrets?
                Have you ever felt a need to cry,
To plead with extraterrestrial beings for a second chance
               At life's past mistakes.
How can I experience heartache when I've barely learned to love?
              How can I stop thinking about you when...
All I want to do is kiss you...
             But I'm scared you'll never kiss me back.
I can't face the worst.
           When I keep seeing you.
Hearing you.
           Breathing you.
I know I need you in my life.
          I guess I'm willing to wager if God can give me a second chance.
Then will you?
         Let's please not have any regrets
Because I love you.



If Then...

If then words were unspoken.The world would be mute, at a stand still until the next word is spoken.

If then, the world did not have color.

Prejudice and racism would not roam the earth looking for the unsuspecting victims.

If then, people could not visit their own psych, would there then be mental instability?

If then, beauty did not compromise or morph with every turn.Love would not be choked like weeds, but blossoms freely like unearthened happiness.

If then form was caged like an angry tiger, what happens to life?

Does it meld together, creating a never-ending unity?

If then, life, consisting of all these things, disappears from existence.

My very soul will sprout wings and fly away,

That twinkling distant star, and like everything else-

Disappears within...

Heart Break

He told me that he loves me.
He told me that he wanted me.
He'd make my life comfotable and take care of me.
But he lied.
He saw that flames burn and ran.
He saw that he was too close to giving his heart away
He was so close to indecent exposure.
I was already stripped of my defenses.
I was already exposed.
But I already gave him my heart.
So is that fair that his intuition pays off while I'm left signing my life away.
I'm confused.
"We need sometime apart..."
"If we keep doin this we goin be in sumthin we don't want..."
What does that mean?
Now I have to pretend I never met him.
Pretend he didnt supply my heart with life.
Forget he was the only one I talked to.
I have to pretend I never met him...
It hurts though.
Heart break hurts.
                                                            Now what?



New Orleans Mother's Day Shooting

New Orleans is not done with correcting its violent history. Yet another incident involving a shooting has wounded 19 people during a Mother's Day parade. Its sad, because its supposed to be a time of celebrating all our mothers have done for us, and we all know too well that noone's mother would approve of their son involved in a shooting. The man must have been crying out for help, yet that doesn't excuse his actions. Its unnecessary to go around shooting people all because you are hurting. My heart really goes out to people like that, because they are suffering, and just need some mental help.Seriously.

Maya Angelou Shall Go Down In History

Favorite Female poet, because she represents everything I stand for- A young, black female trying to survive in a world where you have to do for yourself.   Still I Rise
by Maya Angelou
You may write me down in history With your bitter, twisted lies, You may trod me in the very dirt But still, like dust, I'll rise. Does my sassiness upset you? Why are you beset with gloom? 'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells Pumping in my living room. Just like moons and like suns, With the certainty of tides, Just like hopes springing high, Still I'll rise. Did you want to see me broken? Bowed head and lowered eyes? Shoulders falling down like teardrops, Weakened by my soulful cries? Does my haughtiness offend you? Don't you take it awful hard 'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines Diggin' in my own backyard. You may shoot me with your words, You may cut me with your eyes, You may kill me with your hatefulness, But still, like air, I'll rise. Does my sexiness upset you? Does it come as a surprise That I dance like I've got diamonds At the meeting of my thighs? Out of the huts of history's shame I rise Up from a past that's rooted in pain I rise I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide, Welling and swelling I bear in the tide. Leaving behind nights of terror and fear I rise Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear I rise Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave, I am the dream and the hope of the slave. I rise I rise I rise. Wonder Woman 

Revelations

If we are ballerinas in tap dancers shoes how can we make one voice heard
Among bigger stronger bellows.
Instead of playing "Cat & Mouse" with James Patterson
Or learning how to be the ones taking pictures that solidifies graduation as the Resurrection.
So again, I ask, if life were set like a stage who would be the actors?
Will five minutes in the limelight be enough to get you to worry about the intruders to your heart, your life?
Or are a puppet, because who's pulling your strings?
Don't you get it, do you need a flashcard saying "CAUTION! HOT!" before you gulp it down?
If so, why bother telling you about my revelations if you can't understand limitations...

Senior Year

Senior year went by fast, but I enjoyed it. I got to do everything that I wanted to do, and more...But it was hectic as well. Everything that I had to pay for was expensive and ridiculously crazy. Although I can say that it was well worth it.I get to go out with a bang, but imagine what senior year in college would be like...That's going to be a blast for real! For now I am slightly nostolgic, but I don't think of it as a means to an end, more so a beginnning or a continuation seeing as I will see these same people I see everyday in college.



            So, I'd like to make a shoutout to CLASS OF 2013!

Sleep

Last night I SLEPT GOOD
 When I don't get any sleep I tend to be
                     
                 CRANKY
      EASILY IRRITATED
                                 SLOWLY RESPONSIVE
        BAGS UNDER MY EYES
             SLUGGISH


But thats not me today. I slept good because I went to bed at a decent time when I usually stay up until after midnight.

"About Her" by: James Beard

Fresh air, blue skies

Somebody named Jamie

Opened my eyes

To a smile

To a laugh.

 

Overwelmed

Confusing emotion with speed

Is like telling a baby not to cry.

But thats just it

Emotion comes with tears

If your moving at the speed of light.

How can you savor?

How can you see what's real?

Sometimes emotion is blessed carefulness

That may take years to over come and control.

But what if you can't control that emotion?

What if you don't want to...?

 

 

Love

Snapped!

 
Jagged edges ripped through her mind snagging on the prongs of her inner emotions
What has she done?
There wasn't enough sides to the square she boxed herself in.
She was suffocating as each tear drenched her paper.
With each tear a piece of her dripped, the paper consuming it.
Her life was on the page now.
Her eyesight of what really mattered slightly faded,
Muiltcolored thoughts dotted her retinas.
To the world she was already blubber faced
And post-mortemized.
Her mother had told her she wasn't supposed to feel like this...
Dying wasn't supposed to ignite and spark every single atom of her being.
As the password to her heart gushed a dark red.
The color of maturity.
That little girl was deceased,
Because she had fallen in love...